My Bedroom, or not?

In our house I had the small box room and my sister shared the big bedroom with my stepdad's other daughter, who came at weekends.

My bedroom was perfect. It had a cabin bed and I'd chosen to have it painted yellow, with a selection of Kylie and Jason posters...I loved it!

It had to be immaculately clean at all time and would be inspected regularly. If it didn't meet the required standard it would be trashed and I'd have to start again.

One Friday I'd make the biggest room losing mistake possible, I didn't even know losing my room was ever on the cards. I'd innocently read that sanitary products should be binned and not flushed down the loo like I'd been lead to believe, so stupid old me put it in my bedroom bin and happily went to my dads for the weekend.

Sunday night when I was picked up all hell broke loose. I had made a massive mistake, I was told I was disgusting and as a punishment I'd lost my room!

I got home that night to find all my possessions thrown in a pile in the other room, all my posters torn down. They had thought that the crime was so bad that this is what I deserved. What was going through their minds?

I empty my kids bins for them, it's a non-event. Was it because their golden girl had to share? Look at her beautiful room and our daughter has to share?

I got home from school on the Monday and sat on my new bedroom floor with all my stuff round me and thought "fuck this!" I got on my bike and cycled to my Dad's work, I got lost on the way and ended up on some railway sidings. My stepdad picked me up and took me to my Dad's flat.

I was left there for a week with no clothes or anything, eventually I was picked up and we all went home for a crisis talk. I said I wanted to live with my Dad, he said no. I then said I wanted to live in a kids home, that was a no too. My stepdad then took my upstairs to give me a good hiding, I remember crying myself to sleep that night.

All I did was put something in a bin and I lost my room and got physically punished, did I deserve this? I wasn't a bad kid was I?

My kids room are a tip, we encourage them to tidy them but it's not a big deal. I get a weird sense of satisfaction that they are a mess in a way, it's like sticking two fingers up to my parents.